All Other Things

This Just In – Issue 3

Posted on: May 9, 2008

Yay! It is now acceptable to worship and praise those who do nothing, but are rich and famous!

By Nnenne O. Una

Published: May 9, 2008

You know you all have that one indiscretion. You have that one individual (maybe even more than one) who you secretly follow in the tabloids. The one who would cause your friends to shame you for life, if they know you admired. Well, now there is no shame in worshipping those who are rich by birth. We can now all feel free and proud to make celebrities of those who have had to do nothing but be born into their wealth. The stigma is gone to make one of them your heroes.

I will not name any names, however, you may know one individual as:

First name – the capital of France
Surname – a big name commercially run establishment providing
lodging and meals for guests

In the past, to admit one’s allegiance to said individual was to commit a major faux pas. Those within earshot would laugh. For a long time. Hysterically. At your expense. Forever. But worry no more! Now it is acceptable and even cool to be in awe of a person who only had to be born to be famous. Who got a TV show because her family was rich. Who was cast in movies because her ancestors did all the work. Who has the paparazzi following her every move because that silver spoon has never left her mouth.

Never you mind that said individual has never lifted a finger in her entire life. Never mind that she, in some people’s opinions, has done nothing in her 27 years to warrant praise. But, she released a CD with a catchy single. Stars Are Blind. Come on now! She and others like her (born rich, never work, get hooked up because they are rich) deserve celebrity status! Definitely.

Now, let’s talk about role-model status, shall we? I say make your female children aware of this individual and expose them as early as possible. It’s cool that she drove drunk, but got to do less time than a “normal person” would have done. It’s cool that all she is known for is partying. I know I will want my 8 year old to look up to a person who became famous (or infamous?) for making a sex tape at 22 years of age. Who wouldn’t?

But by no means admire those who, even though they were born rich, actually did something. By themselves. How dare they interview Rashida Jones in Women’s Health Magazine? She does not act crazy. She does not act spoiled. She was born rich but has actually done something with her life. She can sing. She can act. She is not a good person for the media to highlight or our kids to admire! She only graduated from Harvard with a degree in Comparative Religion. Where is her sex tape?

Let us put our admiration where it truly belongs. The first individual mentioned in this article is not the only person who deserves our praise. Nope. There are many others out there. Look for them.

The rich who do nothing is where it is! Thank God for them, because without being able to praise them, I do not know what I would do with my life.


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May 2008
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